It’s taken me a long time, too long, to come crashing down. I remember the moment clearly when I finally agreed that I had no control over my life. I had fought accepting the idea with fierceness but in that moment my life seemed to be upside down. If there were a black belt in attempting to be in control I would have had one.
I’m okay though. Don’t worry about me and how I am doing now that I know I am not in control. It’s better this way.
We do this thing in life where we agree with lies. It starts from the earliest of ages. For me it was probably around the age of 8 or so in a moment that I felt so helpless and out of control that I vowed right then and there that I would protect myself, that I would be in control from then on.
The funny thing is that, even when I thought I was, I was never really in control. I was being controlled – by a lie – that I could protect myself and provide for myself and therefore be in control.
Waves of freedom washed over me when I realized that I was taking the place of what a good Daddy wanted to be for me. My heavenly father wants control, all of it. And He’s good to us with His power and control.
We attempt to control each other, our children, our spouses, our situations… For some moments it can seem that we have control but when the hidden things are revealed we are left holding on to ropes that we have bound around each other with manipulation and they are made up of only fear.
Control is always and only about fear.
Letting go is crazy scary. It’s like skydiving and not really knowing if the parachute will open. But can I tell you what it means? It means fear gets ripped to shreds and it has no way to grip you any more.
Imagine no more fear.
I believe that fear is rampant in our lives. It’s in our parenting, in our marriages, in our kids, in our ministries. It keeps us from doing what we are called to do. It paralyzes us when bad things happen because, since we are in control, it is up to us to fix the problem.
Yep, I just exposed control and it’s dirty little friend – fear.
Think about it for a moment. What scares you to death? Your kids falling off the deep end? You can’t control that. Getting a life threatening disease? You cannot control that. Your spouse cheating on you? You cannot control that. What other people think of you? You cannot control that.
Why not let go? How about we quit talking about living by faith {while secretly controlling everything in our lives} and jump out of the plane?
Why is it worth it? Because God’s in control. And He really is in control, not like you and I think we are in control but really and truly. When we let go of control He can do some amazing things in and through us!
What does it look like to not be in control? It looks like falling to your death. The leap out of the plane is the hardest part. Once you begin to see what it’s like to surrender to your tandem jumper you begin to gain faith. You start to lose yourself in the fall and actually enjoy it. The view is incredible and the adrenaline rush pushes you to do things you never imagined you could.
Analogies aside I want you to know that God is good. It’s Who He is and He never changes. If you were lied to, like I was as a child, and believed in a difficult moment that you couldn’t trust others, that you needed to be in control and protect and provide for yourself, I want you to invite Him to heal your heart. It’s as simple as repenting for believing the lie(s) and asking Him to fill your heart with the truth.
wow that touched my life . God definitely had me come across this post tonight . Thank you deeply for sharing this .
“Don’t bother to give God instructions; just report for duty,” Corrie Ten Boom
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